UGH!
I've had two rough nights now. I have not been able to fall asleep. So annoying! I just lay awake, thinking about lots of things, that really isn't worh thinking about at that hour. So yesterday I went downstairs again to watch some Tv, trying to get more tired and relax. Did it work? No absoluty not. Frickin!
There is just so many things on my mind right now. My husband is working A LOT, and isn't home that much right now. That kinda sucks. At least I work a little so im not alone all the time.
The part I hate the most is that when my husband do come home, he's extremly tired. Which is understandable after working a lot. But either he falls asleep right away infront of the Tv or in bed. I am one of those girls that like to cuddle before bed. My husband not so much but he's trying. We cuddle for a little while, then he's to tired and falls asleep and I lay awake doing absolutly nothing. That is a sucky feeling when your body is tired but you just can't fall asleep, and the having a person right next to you that falls asleep quicker then quick is unfair. I did cry yesterday too. Because i was tired, felt lonley and just really emotional. Well well. That seems to happen to me alot. Crying is just a good way for me to get it all out.

There is a lot going on these few months ahead. This weekend its services the entired weekend. Don't know if I can come yet, it all the depends on if they want to take more than one car.
Then Jonathan has his cd and cesars that he's working with. His doing a myspace for C and other things. On I think oct 1 my baby is leaving for the US. He'll be there for 5 weeks or something like that, might even be longer than that. :( I hope not, since im not going. It will be very hard to be home alone for that long. I don't know what im going to do. I hate sleeping alone, so I really hope i don't have to. I might force Marie to move in with me or sleep at my parents. I don't know yet.
When he's in the US is recording is Third album, Cesars first album. When he comes back he's going to have release concert everywhere. Which is exciting, but again busy and I will probably be home for most of them.

He did warn me before got married that being in a ministry and being a singer is hard work. I can see that. Being a wife of a singer in minstry is a lonely place. Its dawning on me more and more everyday. It's not like he isn't trying hard, cause he really is. But it's still really lonely going to bed alone.
I need to find some kind of substitute ( not a person) But something that I can do that will make me happier and less lonley. Something that I am passionated about. I just don't know what that could be. Lord, help me find something!

Ugh! I don't like my days right now. Its kinda depressing. This is a normal day for me:
I get up at like 10.00 thats when my alarm go off for the third time.
Then I go down, make breakfast, sit infront of the tv.
Go online, check my facebook, and all the blogs that im following.
Then I stay infront of the tv until like 1.30.
Then I take a shower, get dressed, do my make-up.
Go back to the Tv until i go to work around 15.45.

Sucky! It will have to change!

Im going to take a showwr now.
Have a Great Day!